Mustache t minus 2 days.
Extreme Right-Wing nutjob Fox News Analyst Glen Beck thinks Obama is a racist. Whoa whoa whoa, Obama’s black, he can’t be racist. It’s just simple biology, Barack actually is a race, unlike you Mr. Beck; you’re the absence of all races, where is black is the presence of all races.
Brett Favre has finally decided to stay at home this year and not return to Packers’ division rivals the Vikings. I think this is a great move. As much as I love and admire Brett, it’s hard enough for Aaron Rodgers to try and step into your shoes, it would be even harder to have to face you as a division rival. You’ve had a great career Brett, we’d all love to see you as a commentator on Monday Night Football or on ESPN, but just not on the field, and you’re wife’s smoking hot, what are you doing trying to get outta bed in the morning.
The MLB trade deadline is fast approaching and today hasn’t been a sleeper. Ian Snell and Jack Wilson to the Mariners for Cedano and blah blah blah…. Cliff Lee to the 2009 World Champion Phillies for prospects…. And it looks like Roy Holiday is possibly heading to Boston for Buchholz among others. Looks like the Pirates annual Fire Sale continues…..Freddy Sanchez is heading to San Francisco for prospects. It’s good that San Fran is actually trying to build a team around Lincecum and the Kung Fu Panda Pablo Sandoval, they could be a serious contender in a couple of years.
Enough sports…..
Blue M & M’s cause cancer, don’t eat them.
A Granite City woman was killed after being repeatedly struck by a baseball bat yesterday. Like I need another excuse to stay out of that flaccid, festering, vapid, depreciated, city.
Float trip of doom this weekend. No more blog, until Monday or Tuesday. Have a great weekend I think I will.
The problem with Scotland is that it’s full of Scots.
Well kids, i’ve been slacking and now it’s the weekend and I’m just really not in the mood to blog.
So i’ll leave you with some quick hits.
Paris Jackson was apparently named after Paris Hilton. Let’s just hope Paris Jackson shaves her mustache before she gets into porn.
Song of the moment is Fans by Kings of Leon. Deal with it.
The Cardinals aquired Matt Holliday via a trade for 3 nobodys prospects, thus making their lineup one of the best in the entire MLB. They followed suit by routing the Phillies 8 to 1, Holliday went 4 for 5. No big deal, maybe i’ve got a man crush….
I’m tired of racial profiling being the hot topic of the media lately. The cop and Gates were both dicks and that’s it. Gates wants to claim racial profiling and then say that police minority relations are not great, but that’s the reason why. Everytime a black male is arrested by a white cop it’s racial profiling and not just police work. Gates claiming racial profiling only pushes the race relations further apart.
The Hubble Telescope awoke today after being off line for engineers to install an upgraded camera system and found a huge new scar approximately 50 to 100 kilometers wide on jupiter. Early reports suggest an interstellar roundhouse kick was to blame.
Super smoking hot Intellectual ESPN analyist Erin Andrews has been caught in a whirlwind lately. Apparently the ‘reporter’ was filmed, through a keyhole in her hotel room, ironing in the nude. A lot of to do has been made about this starting a war between ESPN and the New York Post. Andrews has been steadfast stating that she wants to be taken seriously and not looked at like a piece of meat. Really? That’s why you wear skin tight clothes on the sidelines of MLB games surrounded by 100 + men, because you want to be taken seriously? Don’t get me wrong, a women should not be discounted as an intellectual because she’s attractive, but on the same note, if you use your looks to get ahead, that’s all you are, an attractive girl on the sidelines, not a journalistic professional. And if you want to be taken seriously as a journalist, may I suggest working for a different company, such as the Playboy for instance….Zing!
If ifs and buts were raisins and nuts we’d be having a hell of a party.
A New Jersey man purchased the most expensive pack of cigarettes this weekend, to the tune of $25,000,000,000,000,000. Yeah, that’s 25 quadrillion dollars and more than our National Debt, at least for the week, who knows how much money the government’s going to ask to borrow this week. Okay so they weren’t really that expensive, but that’s what the bank charged him, that and a 15 dollar overdraft fee. The man said he nearly had a heart attack when he got his credit card statement, but immediately called his bank who fixed the problem, blaming it on Visa. Visa in turn blamed it on the bank. In a mildly related story, the world debt record holder, me, has $25,000,000,000,000 worth of debt on his credit card, but it’s legit. Oh goodbye credit score….goodbye.
This next story is serious so get that smile off your face. A stage intended to have the world’s biggest waste of oxygen, Madonna, collapsed earlier today killing one man and injuring others. I would say its karma but I don’t think karma kills other people, so I’m going with my second theory, it’s death coming to exact his revenge in a final destination type fury. Reigning down random acts of murder while providing teenage boys with just a little bit of T and A to get the blood flowing. Go to Africa Madonna, death will find you like he found Devin Sawa in Paris, YOU CAN’T RUN FROM DEATH MADONNA, HE’S COMING AND HELL’S COMING WITH HIM!
Wow, that got out of control.
Stop being an idiot, go see Harry Potter, I can’t even begin to tell you how good that movie is. It is just absolutely terrific. Bruno was also pretty funny, but I felt it fell way short of Borat. I think the one thing missing from Bruno is he was just not a likeable character, while Borat was.
Recently I’ve been feeding my Golden Tee addiction and I’ve got to say it’s pretty awesome. The Cat’s Meow in Soulard has the nicest machine I’ve seen yet, so if you get a chance go swing by, have a 1$ shot, a 2 dollar beer and play 18 for 4 dollars.
Much Love
I don’t mind you under my skin, I let the bad parts in.
Well kids it was a rough day on the ole kickball field. Good in Bed lost 15 - love and the second game of the doubleheader was lost in a heartbreaker 5 - 2. Although there were some bright spots. For example, the two runs we scored were the first of the season. Our defense made some pretty good plays as well. Still it was a terrible day and I can’t wait to get back out on the field and defend our honor, which we may not have much of left.
After months of speculation and with names attached such as Common, Bradley Cooper, Brad Pitt, and etc. it is confirmed that Ryan Reynolds will be playing The Green Lantern. He also will be the first actor to play a main character in both a DC comics and Marvel film. Pretty cool.
Harry Potter comes out this week and in an unprecedented move, I will be at the midnight show, disregarding the fact that I will have to work 8 hours later. Bruno is showing this weekend and i’m going to go see it somewhere around noon tomorrow.
Looks like Raging Rivers is happening on Monday. Who’s down?
Short one tonight, i’m really busy.
Much Love